I wrote a post a few months ago about how I wasn’t racing this year. I didn’t feel like I was mentally up for it and didn’t have that fire within me to compete. The idea of stepping on a starting line didn’t excite me – it scared me.
I was worried that with a training schedule and the pressure of a race, I would have a setback after all the progress I’ve made the past year in finding balance and peace. I put racing on the back burner while I poured energy into other things (weight restoration, mental healing, travel, etc.). I wasn’t confident that I could balance all of that with a training schedule and race on the horizon, so I chose not to try. I chose instead to give my body what it needed at the time.
I’m very happy with that decision. It was the best thing for me, and I have zero regrets. But I knew all along that I would eventually get to a place where I’d be ready to toe the line again. I’m in that place now, and I know that my time away from competition got me here.
During that time away, while focusing on my wellbeing and going on epic adventures, I also watched James train for a 50k trail race (which he completed last month, and totally crushed). I accompanied him on many of his training runs, up 18 miles, and had so much fun.
As I watched and partly experienced his training I noticed and appreciated his attitude, his ability to listen to his body, and his level of commitment. James is someone who doesn’t let any one thing consume him. Something I’ve worked hard at and have made significant progress in, but it definitely doesn’t come naturally for me the way it seems to for him. Of course, he doesn’t come from a competitive running background and II’m sure that has something to do with it. But nevertheless, watching him gave me a visual of what I want as I prepare to race again.
He was committed to his training, but he wasn’t obsessed with it. He wasn’t thinking about his long run for days before, he didn’t over-analyze everything he ate surrounding his runs, and he made sure that things like travel, social events, time with me & Koa (our adorable goldendoodle), trying out new breweries and restaurants, going to concerts, etc. were priorities and that running would fit in where it made sense.
My favorite part of James’ race story is that when he finished running 31 miles up and down mountains on the Oregon coast, his text to let me know he finished read…
“It was great! I had a blast!”
I didn’t get any information on his place or his finish time because he didn’t care – it didn’t matter. He trained hard, ran for fun and throughout all of it (the training and the racing) he remained a whole human, not an exercise-addicted robot (basically what I turned into while training for my first marathon).
Because this was his attitude throughout training, I adopted it as well. Granted I didn’t have the pressure of an upcoming race, but when I would do training runs with him I did my best to follow his lead and just relax, taking each day as it came and enjoying the time on the trails. It gave me confidence that I am capable of training for a race without feeling like a slave to it.
So that brings me to where I am now… Ready to race again. And what better way to kick things off than with the Boston Marathon?!
A month or so ago I received an email alerting me that registration had opened for the 2022 Boston Marathon, which is to be held on Patriots Day (April 18th) for the first time in three years. Because of COVID, the qualifying window was extended and my time from the 2019 Wineglass Marathon fell within it.
The last time I received notice that I was eligible to register was for the October 2021 race (a makeup race from the canceled 2021 April event). While I was torn, I made the decision turn it down due to reasons mentioned earlier in this post. That was the right decision.
But when I got word that I was being given a second opportunity I immediately, without hesitation, submitted an application. I checked the status of my application every day, anxiously waiting to hear if the running dream I’ve held onto since I was a kid would become a reality.
Last week I finally opened my email to see the iconic blue and yellow, “Congratulations!”
A dream coming true.
I am filled with excitement rather than stress and anxiety. And that’s how I know I’m ready.
I know what I don’t want to do (a repeat of my first marathon training / racing experience) and my time away from racing helped me to realize what I do want.
I want it to be fun, I want to smile through it, I want to challenge myself, I want to keep the balance I’ve worked to find, and I want to avoid setting a time goal because to me, the Boston Marathon is about the experience. And if I run an hour slower than I did at the Wineglass Marathon BUT I have fun doing it, that’s a victory in my book.
So, let’s do this!
I’ll continue to post throughout the marathon training process to take you along with me!